This Page

has moved to a new address:

http://www.fromengineertosahm.com

Sorry for the inconvenience…

Redirection provided by Blogger to WordPress Migration Service
----------------------------------------------- Blogger Template Style Name: Rounders Date: 27 Feb 2004 ----------------------------------------------- */ body { background:#aba; margin:0; padding:20px 10px; text-align:center; font:x-small/1.5em "Trebuchet MS",Verdana,Arial,Sans-serif; color:#333; font-size/* */:/**/small; font-size: /**/small; } /* Page Structure ----------------------------------------------- */ /* The images which help create rounded corners depend on the following widths and measurements. If you want to change these measurements, the images will also need to change. */ @media all { #content { width:740px; margin:0 auto; text-align:left; } #main { width:485px; float:left; background:#fff url("http://www.blogblog.com/rounders/corners_main_bot.gif") no-repeat left bottom; margin:15px 0 0; padding:0 0 10px; color:#000; font-size:97%; line-height:1.5em; } #main2 { float:left; width:100%; background:url("http://www.blogblog.com/rounders/corners_main_top.gif") no-repeat left top; padding:10px 0 0; } #main3 { background:url("http://www.blogblog.com/rounders/rails_main.gif") repeat-y; padding:0; } #sidebar { width:240px; float:right; margin:15px 0 0; font-size:97%; line-height:1.5em; } } @media handheld { #content { width:90%; } #main { width:100%; float:none; background:#fff; } #main2 { float:none; background:none; } #main3 { background:none; padding:0; } #sidebar { width:100%; float:none; } } /* Links ----------------------------------------------- */ a:link { color:#258; } a:visited { color:#666; } a:hover { color:#c63; } a img { border-width:0; } /* Blog Header ----------------------------------------------- */ @media all { #header { background:#456 url("http://www.blogblog.com/rounders/corners_cap_top.gif") no-repeat left top; margin:0 0 0; padding:8px 0 0; color:#fff; } #header div { background:url("http://www.blogblog.com/rounders/corners_cap_bot.gif") no-repeat left bottom; padding:0 15px 8px; } } @media handheld { #header { background:#456; } #header div { background:none; } } #blog-title { margin:0; padding:10px 30px 5px; font-size:200%; line-height:1.2em; } #blog-title a { text-decoration:none; color:#fff; } #description { margin:0; padding:5px 30px 10px; font-size:94%; line-height:1.5em; } /* Posts ----------------------------------------------- */ .date-header { margin:0 28px 0 43px; font-size:85%; line-height:2em; text-transform:uppercase; letter-spacing:.2em; color:#357; } .post { margin:.3em 0 25px; padding:0 13px; border:1px dotted #bbb; border-width:1px 0; } .post-title { margin:0; font-size:135%; line-height:1.5em; background:url("http://www.blogblog.com/rounders/icon_arrow.gif") no-repeat 10px .5em; display:block; border:1px dotted #bbb; border-width:0 1px 1px; padding:2px 14px 2px 29px; color:#333; } a.title-link, .post-title strong { text-decoration:none; display:block; } a.title-link:hover { background-color:#ded; color:#000; } .post-body { border:1px dotted #bbb; border-width:0 1px 1px; border-bottom-color:#fff; padding:10px 14px 1px 29px; } html>body .post-body { border-bottom-width:0; } .post p { margin:0 0 .75em; } p.post-footer { background:#ded; margin:0; padding:2px 14px 2px 29px; border:1px dotted #bbb; border-width:1px; border-bottom:1px solid #eee; font-size:100%; line-height:1.5em; color:#666; text-align:right; } html>body p.post-footer { border-bottom-color:transparent; } p.post-footer em { display:block; float:left; text-align:left; font-style:normal; } a.comment-link { /* IE5.0/Win doesn't apply padding to inline elements, so we hide these two declarations from it */ background/* */:/**/url("http://www.blogblog.com/rounders/icon_comment.gif") no-repeat 0 45%; padding-left:14px; } html>body a.comment-link { /* Respecified, for IE5/Mac's benefit */ background:url("http://www.blogblog.com/rounders/icon_comment.gif") no-repeat 0 45%; padding-left:14px; } .post img { margin:0 0 5px 0; padding:4px; border:1px solid #ccc; } blockquote { margin:.75em 0; border:1px dotted #ccc; border-width:1px 0; padding:5px 15px; color:#666; } .post blockquote p { margin:.5em 0; } /* Comments ----------------------------------------------- */ #comments { margin:-25px 13px 0; border:1px dotted #ccc; border-width:0 1px 1px; padding:20px 0 15px 0; } #comments h4 { margin:0 0 10px; padding:0 14px 2px 29px; border-bottom:1px dotted #ccc; font-size:120%; line-height:1.4em; color:#333; } #comments-block { margin:0 15px 0 9px; } .comment-data { background:url("http://www.blogblog.com/rounders/icon_comment.gif") no-repeat 2px .3em; margin:.5em 0; padding:0 0 0 20px; color:#666; } .comment-poster { font-weight:bold; } .comment-body { margin:0 0 1.25em; padding:0 0 0 20px; } .comment-body p { margin:0 0 .5em; } .comment-timestamp { margin:0 0 .5em; padding:0 0 .75em 20px; color:#666; } .comment-timestamp a:link { color:#666; } .deleted-comment { font-style:italic; color:gray; } .paging-control-container { float: right; margin: 0px 6px 0px 0px; font-size: 80%; } .unneeded-paging-control { visibility: hidden; } /* Profile ----------------------------------------------- */ @media all { #profile-container { background:#cdc url("http://www.blogblog.com/rounders/corners_prof_bot.gif") no-repeat left bottom; margin:0 0 15px; padding:0 0 10px; color:#345; } #profile-container h2 { background:url("http://www.blogblog.com/rounders/corners_prof_top.gif") no-repeat left top; padding:10px 15px .2em; margin:0; border-width:0; font-size:115%; line-height:1.5em; color:#234; } } @media handheld { #profile-container { background:#cdc; } #profile-container h2 { background:none; } } .profile-datablock { margin:0 15px .5em; border-top:1px dotted #aba; padding-top:8px; } .profile-img {display:inline;} .profile-img img { float:left; margin:0 10px 5px 0; border:4px solid #fff; } .profile-data strong { display:block; } #profile-container p { margin:0 15px .5em; } #profile-container .profile-textblock { clear:left; } #profile-container a { color:#258; } .profile-link a { background:url("http://www.blogblog.com/rounders/icon_profile.gif") no-repeat 0 .1em; padding-left:15px; font-weight:bold; } ul.profile-datablock { list-style-type:none; } /* Sidebar Boxes ----------------------------------------------- */ @media all { .box { background:#fff url("http://www.blogblog.com/rounders/corners_side_top.gif") no-repeat left top; margin:0 0 15px; padding:10px 0 0; color:#666; } .box2 { background:url("http://www.blogblog.com/rounders/corners_side_bot.gif") no-repeat left bottom; padding:0 13px 8px; } } @media handheld { .box { background:#fff; } .box2 { background:none; } } .sidebar-title { margin:0; padding:0 0 .2em; border-bottom:1px dotted #9b9; font-size:115%; line-height:1.5em; color:#333; } .box ul { margin:.5em 0 1.25em; padding:0 0px; list-style:none; } .box ul li { background:url("http://www.blogblog.com/rounders/icon_arrow_sm.gif") no-repeat 2px .25em; margin:0; padding:0 0 3px 16px; margin-bottom:3px; border-bottom:1px dotted #eee; line-height:1.4em; } .box p { margin:0 0 .6em; } /* Footer ----------------------------------------------- */ #footer { clear:both; margin:0; padding:15px 0 0; } @media all { #footer div { background:#456 url("http://www.blogblog.com/rounders/corners_cap_top.gif") no-repeat left top; padding:8px 0 0; color:#fff; } #footer div div { background:url("http://www.blogblog.com/rounders/corners_cap_bot.gif") no-repeat left bottom; padding:0 15px 8px; } } @media handheld { #footer div { background:#456; } #footer div div { background:none; } } #footer hr {display:none;} #footer p {margin:0;} #footer a {color:#fff;} /* Feeds ----------------------------------------------- */ #blogfeeds { } #postfeeds { padding:0 15px 0; }

Monday, June 8, 2015

Life Experiment




Yesterday our church had a special recognition of the high school seniors in our church who are graduating this year.  As I watched each student walk up to the podium with their parents, I felt a lump form in my throat.  It made me realize how short the time is that we have our children in our home, and how lucky I am to have a husband that is able to support our family and supports my decision to stay home with our boys. 

The ceremony also made me reflect on my past 15 years since high school graduation.  I listened to all these students plans for their future, and wondered if they were aware of how drastically those plans could change in the next 15 years.  At their age I had planned to become a pediatrician.  I wanted to help families with ill children, much as my family had been helped while dealing with my childhood illness.  As I went to college and started to pursue this goal, I ended up on a very different path. I realized that I would want a family one day, and that I would want to be with my children as much as I could.  Thanks to my dad's success in business, I had the privilege of knowing lawyers, doctors, and successful business people.  I was aware of the sacrifices that would have to be made in order to pursue these professions, and I knew the family life I would eventually want.  I looked into the cost of medical school, and the time it would take me to actually become a doctor.  I also started volunteering at hospitals to see what being a doctor looked like on a day to day basis.  I realized that the doctors did not actually spend much time with the patients or their families.  I realized that I could help families in another way, instead of being a doctor.  After seeing the reality of my dream, my dream changed. 

So I pursued engineering because it looked to be a good way to have a profession and a family.  Many companies and engineering organizations came to my college and spoke about how well companies were managing dual career families, that you could have both the family life and the career you wanted.  And this is true, on some level.  My husband and I managed a dual career family for 10 years.  It was messy at times, but that is life.  As our careers progressed, however, we realized that one of us would need to take the lead, that we would need to follow one of our careers.  As we approached mid career, our jobs became more demanding on our time and expectations were higher.  Managing a dual career family became very difficult. 

I do need to say, this is just our family's experience.  I have friends who manage a dual career family very well.  They share in childcare drop offs and pickups so that their children are only at daycare for 8 hours every day.  They help each other in meal preparation.  Both parents are home by 6 every night.  Dads can still coach tball, and moms can take kids to gymnastics.  This was just not our reality.  As our reality became more evident, so did my dream.  My dream changed again. 

I think that's the key to navigating life.  We need to allow our dreams to change, to allow ourselves and our spouses to change.  The reality is life experiences change us.  We should not fight the change, but allow it to happen.  Who we thought we would be at 18 is likely not who we will be when we're 35, and that is ok.  More life experience is like being given more data in a problem.  The right piece of data can completely change the solution.  Certain experiences in life can completely change your plans.  My hope for these high school graduates is that they allow the change and embrace it.

Labels:

2 Comments:

At January 20, 2016 at 8:36 AM , Blogger Unknown said...

For sure! I always wanted to be a SAHM, but first I had to work while hubby did his schooling (let's call his version of college "delayed schooling"). He had wanted to be a doctor, too. But we discussed wanting a family and he also decided that he didn't want to miss out on our children's lives while being on call regularly. It's very tough to juggle it all!

 
At January 20, 2016 at 3:19 PM , Blogger Unknown said...

So very true Jamie!

 

Post a Comment

Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]

<< Home